The Years of Sleeping

The Eagle has landed

2007-05-16T13:03:00.000-07:00

The first glimpse of NYC.The new roomate, Lisa (this is the before shot, haircuts tomorrow)The new digs.And the new dogs, Seamus and Olive (on the couch)

Julie throws a BarB despite the snow outside

2007-04-21T22:00:00.000-07:00

Mumbai, Doha, London, DC... Pittsburgh

2007-04-13T03:56:00.000-07:00

It's been a whirlwind tour, but after only three days in Pittsburgh I am convinced failure is imminent and tempted to take up permanent residence in my parents' basement. Mercifully, I've developed alternate plans and continue to set them in motion by a kind of remote control.New York City, here I come!

Too much time has passed without an update

2007-03-19T00:16:00.001-07:00

I am pleased to report I did not even notice the passing of my fifth wedding anniversary until after it had passed. Here's somewhat of an update in pictures.That's me n Lizzie n Helen on a Saturday night. On the road to Mapusa.. My room in Hercules Manor. A not so light lunch at La Plage in Aswem. Anna, me and Debora at Shore Bar.

18 March 07 or, buh bye Chennai

2007-03-19T00:04:00.000-07:00

Leaving Mahabalipuram via Chennai, I decided to take the bus this time instead of a car. The car from the airport to Mhblprm cost INRs 750, or about $19. A fortune, almost the equivalent of two nights in my hotel. Besides, after a week of scrimping and saving, by using the money I would’ve spent on a car I had enough for another 1 gig memory stick. Mine picked up some virus that proved fatal the

I feel pretty

2007-03-06T01:02:00.000-08:00

Pretty freakishAnd yet, I'm about to head off to the dentist. Medical tourism in Bangalore. Lovin it.

27 Jan 07

2007-02-05T03:41:00.001-08:00

The chorus of dogs. The honking of the horn. It must be 6.46! I am listening to Cat Power, sitting in the kitchen of the house where I now find myself. It’s two doors down from the yoga shala, so the location is ideal. Formerly inhabited by four to eight people at any given time, I can’t say the same for the interior. I’ve installed some bright, solid-colored saris and feel the décor is much

Update

2007-01-01T02:32:00.000-08:00

The Honda? It's actually a Honda Activa. I discover this after writing not one but TWO entries on the bike. Ha![tagname]

Merry Christmas

2006-12-24T23:31:00.000-08:00

Wish you were here?Welcome to my midlife crisis.[tagname]

Six Weeks

2006-12-15T23:55:00.000-08:00

We are almost at the butt end of week six on this course. We’ve just had three solid weeks without a day off. Yesterday we had to be at the yoga shala at 6am for pranayama (breathing meditation), then practice 7.30 to 9.15ish, then assist with classes 9.45 to 11.15 ish. Then discourse from 11.30 to 12. Then back for an entire led primary talk through (which made that the third practice of my day)

Our House

2006-12-11T00:55:00.000-08:00

The saga of where to live continues, owing very much to my display of one of my ex’s most annoying personality traits: equivocation. In my fantasy of coming to India to study yoga, I pictured myself living in some quaint little shack for maybe $150 a month. It wasn’t too detailed, there was no image of the bathroom or kitchen specifically. Maybe a sunny courtyard with flowers. Windows. Walls.The

At last I have a functioning camera!

2006-12-09T00:14:00.000-08:00

Here are some pictures from Goa.Last night, Xander (master of the beat box) and Linda (mistress of flame), put on a show for Adriane's birthday. She's 28!Here's Linda performing:Nathan and Adriane, with me in the background making the Loser sign. Backwards.Adriane and a pup:The courtyard at Big Brother.

My Honda, take two

2006-12-06T22:57:00.000-08:00

It seems now that Doha was just a warm up for Goa, starting with heavy exposure I got to the British, their lexicon and their sense of humor. I once called a co-worker and was flirting hard with him just for kicks, only to be told later the call had gone down with his girlfriend like “a cold cup of sick.” I was, to borrow a phrase, gobsmacked. Thanks to that kind of verbiage and irony training

My Honda Aviator

2006-12-03T22:04:00.001-08:00

Before coming to Goa I had a vision of myself puttering around town with my yoga mat strapped to my back. I did that exactly one time before I parked the yoga mat at the shala, but no matter, I am still grooving around on my scooter. Everyone in Goa has a Honda Aviator. It’s the vehicle of choice. There are your random Yamaha or Royal Enfield motorcycles, but for the most part we’re bouncing

The fabulous Emil

2006-12-03T21:54:00.001-08:00

The fabulous Emil Emil has come to offer us a pathway to spiritual enlightenment. In addition to yoga philosophy sessions, he leads nightly pranayama. I have never done regular pranayama, feeling that the meditation time I get at the close of my asana practice was plenty. Besides, who can sit cross-legged for a half hour? While I’m still not that good at the sitting part, I have found

House music

2006-11-27T22:54:00.000-08:00

At some point I’m really going to have to make a budget. I think. What keeps me from doing that is the fact I have no idea what the end point is. Or what that even means. (All suggestions welcome. Suggestions may be ignored, only to be adopted later.) Right, so, how can you budget for that? One thing I do know, is that spending less is better. Plus I think a relatively constant state of dis-ease

Miracle cure?

2006-11-27T22:49:00.001-08:00

I was kind of hoping to show off a picture of the massive burn I gave myself pouring hot water from a kettle. Just something I’d do if my camera were here. With luck, it will be soon…Regardless, it will be too late, because the burn is just about completely healed in about a week’s time. Mind you, this is after a Western surgeon looked at it and laughed when I told him it wasn’t really hurting,

La la la!

2006-11-26T04:48:00.000-08:00

For those of you familiar with the Middle East, you'll read that title as No no no!I just had the opportunity to crack out some of my Arabic as I sat down to a big plate of chicken cous cous. And that made me happy. That and the fact that it was served in the crook of a road under a jungle canopy, with the beach a short walk away. Gorgeous.It's about 6.20pm here now, and I am ready for bed. I

House drama

2006-11-23T00:03:00.000-08:00

Goa has long been a popular tourist destination for Brits and Israelis, the place is full of them. No wonder it’s purported to be on Al Qaeda’s hit list, even if you don’t consider the fact that it dares to be largely Christian in a Muslim country, having been built up first by the Portuguese. My destination in Goa was Anjuna Beach, a

Casa Mojo

2006-11-15T07:19:00.000-08:00

Casa Mojo Most of the yogis who work at or are studying to be teachers at Brahmani Yoga stay in one house just up the road from Anjuna Beach, Casa Mojo. It is lovingly referred to as Big Brother house, though the main controversy so far has come from watching a couple of people on the outside of the training program (a former teacher trainee and one of his friends), rather than people on

Wide awake in India

2006-11-12T05:06:00.000-08:00

Learning about myself and my yoga and how to better navigate within the world.This is unbelievably weird. Sometimes I get this feeling coming over me like, hey, check me out, I'm doing India all by myself. Like, I'm a big girl now!Other times I just feel completely high. In a good way. Except that I've lost both pairs of my lovely sunglasses and must replace with something crappy. (Sorry, Heidi!)

Rumplestiltskin!

2006-10-11T14:58:00.000-07:00

When I was young I had a recording of this fairy tale. What I remember about it is that in order to free a damsel from his claim over her, said maiden had to guess Rumplestiltskin's name. When she did he was so mad he stomped and stomped until the ground swallowed him up. Shows me to be a child of the 70s; in the classic version he's so angry he tears himself in two. Now that's a powerful visual

The meta-for

2006-10-09T22:58:00.000-07:00

I got a new yoga mat and I'm not so sure about it. It's stronger, tougher and much heavier than the last one, which has been showing clear signs of demise for some time. My practice flourished with the old mat, taking and giving joy and sorrow along the way. But it stopped working for me, finally hurling abuses in the form of its own shards flicking forth as I moved through my routine. It took a

Free at LAST!

2006-10-08T23:06:00.000-07:00

We have settled on a date. November 3. It's coming quickly and I alternate between joyful and fearful regularly.

Did I sell my car or my body?

2006-10-03T21:53:00.000-07:00

A guy in a thobe sporting a 50 cent ball cap came to look at my car. He brought his man Friday, maybe a driver? A translator at the very least. His name was Tayyeeb. I'm still not sure what the name of the car buyer was, or if indeed I've sold the car at all.I may have made a classic misstep when, to seal the deal, I thrust forth my hand to shake on it. Oops. That's haram, touching a woman, an

Got to love Ramadan

2006-09-21T22:52:00.000-07:00

OK, not really. The bit about not eating or drinking all day to know suffering is the bit that really gets me. I'm a little unclear as to how people who lived in the desesrt ca. 600 really needed to get more up close and personal with suffering. They were already banned from pork all the time. But a month of no water during the heat of the day? I just don't get that, and yet there are sects who

What to give away

2006-09-15T21:09:00.000-07:00

What to keep.As I transition to the next phase, whatever that may be, I know only one thing. I'm going to need less stuff. Unless it's nicer. Then I need it, too. It's like I've added a not-so-funny punch line to the old Woody Allen saw:WA: This restaurant is awful, the food is terrible. And the portions are so small.YOS: Yeah, I hear they're raising the prices too. I made a reservation for next

Bang a gong

2006-08-29T21:16:00.000-07:00

Ah, to be in a city where one must make it. Bangkok. Unlike Doha, with kilometer after kilometer of unpeopled shops selling unneeded items, Bangkok sizzles with the energy of unrequited greed. My first trip there in 2002 left me unimpressed. I remembered it as a steamy, polluted, overcrowded Asian city. But this last trip, after two years of living in a place where any expression of basic human

Political Correctness

2006-08-15T21:17:00.000-07:00

Of course I have my own issues and those are the ones I really care about and other than that screw political correctness. And then you see the 24 pt headline: Jews and their treachery.Now, I hate a news headline without a verb, too, but in this case that was certainly not the first thought that came to mind. This was in a section of the weekend paper titled Islam, which is meant to explain the

Happy happy joy joy

2006-08-13T23:29:00.000-07:00

Weekends here come in reverse order. Friday is Sunday. Saturday is Saturday. Sunday is Monday. Three years into it and I've still not managed to adjust. How is one to come to a screeching halt at the end of a work week, with the knowledge that tomorrow must be given over to running errands that can't possibly be done during the week because on your lunch hour every bloody service is shut for

Hold the Vice, Miami

2006-08-11T21:05:00.000-07:00

I don't really remember the television show, though I know I watched it. Was it any good? I don't know. The acting? Beats me. I have my suspicions though, because I have no affinity for the memory of it. Unlike happening upon an episode of Lost in Space or Gilligan's Island, should Miami Vice flicker on the screen as I flipped through the channels I'd blow right by it. Except now, because I'm

The Accidental Misogynist

2006-08-05T12:31:00.000-07:00

American women are bitches. But don't take my word for it. I just read all about it in Harper's. The essaayist's Ukrainian excursion promised true love, so long as love true for you means not having to say you're sorry, since you apparently don't have to communicate at all. To wit, from the international marriage broker himself: You are not going to have to talk to them for half an hour and then

The tea lady

2006-08-03T21:34:00.001-07:00

Something I still have a hard time getting used to is the tea lady. Oh, I immediately warmed to the idea of someone bringing me coffee all the time. But that's not exactly how it works out. She spends a lot of time on her computer in the kitchen, not answering the phone. I know, because when I go to get my coffee, she's sitting there staring at the screen. Noha said, "I think in Sudanese coffee

Help me, Rooda

2006-08-03T12:57:00.000-07:00

Abbeyyahs used to frighten me a little bit. Why would anyone swath themselves from head to toe in black unless they had something to hide, right? But living among them, I've become immune to that kind of response. It would be like trying to maintian a constant orange-level alert. Maybe I'm supposed to be doing that anyway, considering the current climate and all, but didn't somebody say no

The bombs, they are a flyin'

2006-08-03T12:45:00.000-07:00

And the silence is deafening.

Safety first!

2006-07-30T12:45:00.000-07:00

We went for a ride in the dunes in the blazing heat of summer to satisfy our guests. Death Con III began, like all good Gulf trips, at the mall. To buy condoms.I had to make my friend Eric get them. He was a man, after all. It's been five months. I haven't used a single one...

ch ch ch changes

2006-07-28T05:57:00.000-07:00

I know it's a mood, and it, too shall pass (for instance, see yesterday's material), but, I just have zero desire to be in a relationship. It's not like I type that with a kind of I'm-hating-the-world fury. It's just, the thought of taking on another person, their quirks, their needs...ugh. I am totally enjoying being on my own. Because, perhaps even worse than the fact of having to deal with

Deportation Daydream

2006-07-26T21:21:00.000-07:00

Do all gay men immediately assume that good-looking, single men with good jobs and hair and teeth to boot are gay? Is it because they are gay?My gaydar is excellent. I'm just in one of those, I-don't-wanna-believe it phases. For one thing, it's illegal here. Now, call me crazy, but why would you move somewhere on purpose, where your lifestyle was not only frowned upon, but deportation-worthy

In the boot

2006-07-24T12:30:00.000-07:00

The more otherwordly my life seems to me, the more I find others just like it.Take the woman I met tonight who is also waiting for her divorce papers to come through (she has an awesome blog but I'll post it more surreptitiously another time as we both like our privacy).Then there was the chat with K, which left us both howling. Our partners somehow managed to leave us both by surprise. That's

Celebrity fragrances, H21

2006-07-24T12:15:00.000-07:00

Eau de MojitoEau de CurScent of a WomanWhite ShouldersWalk of Shame[tagname]

The Fix Up

2006-07-21T21:29:00.000-07:00

Yesterday I went scuba-diving with a couple of friends who I think may have been trying to fix me up with a fourth. I think this because a couple of nights ago they tried to set up my pal Karen with someone else who joined our group.Karen is hot. She's maybe 28 or 29. Thin. Cute clothes. Well groomed. In my most wildly desperate moments as a yenta (I used to write a blind date column, and

My next husband is already dead

2006-07-18T14:08:00.000-07:00

[tagname]

How much is too much?

2006-07-17T12:21:00.000-07:00

So tonight I was teaching yoga, and during the meditation part a couple of the trainers from the weight room started messing around in the supply room, and as I'm using my best NPR voice to tell everyone to let go and relax, I trilly on back to where they are and say, "Could you just shut up please?" Or something equally tranquil and friendly-sounding. Thank god yoga is peopled with hyperactive

Iban longhouse

2006-06-30T03:49:00.000-07:00

Iban longhouse Originally uploaded by yearsofsleeping. I slept here and did not die. Though the jury's still out on dengue fever, malaria, and heps a, b or c. Yum.

My soul is being sucked out through my nose

2006-06-20T15:18:00.000-07:00

I didn't think much of that line til one of my yoga partners repeated it back to me recently. And then I saw this photo.It's the expatriate life.So I'm headed off to Borneo for ten days without the benefit of cell phones, internet access, or even flush toilets. It's all in the name of heading off the fifth horseman of the apocalypse: boredom.[soul][yoga][borneo]

More better bad

2006-06-20T03:59:00.000-07:00

There is music here for just about anyone. Who's old. (ish)http://www.worksafevideos.com/music_videos/

Disposable time

2006-06-19T01:25:00.000-07:00

A friend said to me the other day, "You have more disposable time than I do." When I did the kind of fake laugh thing and said, "you mean discretionary, right?" She just kinda looked at me with something that was supposed to be a smile but really was the contorted face of pity that can only be mustered by the self righteous. She didn't say anything.I'd grown smug myself. Kind of. I'd listen to

All the news that's fit to print

2006-06-18T00:49:00.000-07:00

Of late the spellbinding coverage of ambassadorial visits and cables of congratulations has been interrupted by a somewhat disturbing trend. Reportage. Oh, sure it's vague. And, OK, maybe they don't actually talk to multiple sources. But it's a start. Check out the recent crime sheet.Liquor mix-up man is clearedAn Egyptian accused of drinking liquor has been acquitted after explaining to the

The sun also rinses

2006-06-17T01:34:00.000-07:00

"Constant sunshine creates a barren desert." East Liberty Presbyterian Church signboard, ca. 1999At the turn of the 22nd century, a team a Norwegian archaelogists uncovered the remains of a tribal society whose customs are only now beginning to be understood.These were a people for whom worship played an important role in their daily lives. Their sun god, PRADA, would likely have been the most

Bartleby the Employer

2006-06-13T08:36:00.000-07:00

The HR situation here is desperate for employers and employees alike. Some of us are fired and deported with little adieu, while others can't seem to break free in spite of our best attempts.YOS: I want to put in my resignation for early September. What do you think about that?BE: I would prefer not to.YOS: Huh?BE: (silence)YOS: Well, what I mean is, I could be flexible so we have a seamless

Yo, Imam

2006-06-12T13:07:00.000-07:00

We're thinking of becoming Muslim to meet men. Counterintuitive? Let's look at the facts.It's a whole new chat up line: Check out the bruise on my forehead! This potent lure deters all comers from noticing chest or waist size, and tells everyone just how low we'll stoop.Our colleague, we'll call her Amy since that's her name, in just five years she's on her second husband. Then there's Jackie,

Syriana?

2006-06-11T21:00:00.000-07:00

It opened here. Complete with the suicide bomber at the end even if his plight--unemployment, disenfranchisement and horrendous living conditions ameliorated only by assimalation at the local madrassa--was edited down to make it look as if he happened upon the opportunity to die for Islam.I felt far less self-conscious than I did when Fahrenheit 9/11 screened, of course I'd only just arrived. I

Lovin' it, or, Ahmed wants to make me his bride

2006-06-09T23:57:00.000-07:00

There's nothing quite like getting dolled up to go out to a bar with your girlfriends, you're dressing for them, after all. Of course you want men to notice, too.We're shoulder to shoulder in a bar at the Intercontinental -- only hotel bars are allowed to serve liquor -- watching the dance floor when the unthinkable happens. We realize we're in a gay bar."It's rainin' men" starts to play but

Yanni, inshallah... bukara

2006-06-07T22:13:00.000-07:00

Roughly translated it means: Er, God willing...tomorrow.Often, it is used in conjunction with mafi mushkilla--which sounds more like what it often means, that you will soon wish you were dead from the swift blow of a hitman rather than what's about to be laid on you--no problem!When will I get my car back?Mafi mushkill. Yanni, inshallah...bukara.It's 110 here at 7am. Right now. And humid. Not

Cats do not rule

2006-06-05T21:09:00.000-07:00

Sophie is a charlatan. The minute Mam gets home that bitch folds like a cheap suit. Napping all day and then, bang!, you'd think that's woman's arrival was the best thing to happen since pop top lids. And you know she just wants dinner. But look at Mam, lapping it up. Can't she see through that?I do not "beg." I do not "come," "sit" or "stay." And I certainly wouldn't go into Mam's office. Has

Dogs rule

2006-06-03T06:12:00.000-07:00

I just could not drag myself into the office yesterday, so I sent my number one. Sophie. Sure, it’s in her nature to hunt and kill, but I thought everything would be OK. At the very least I thought, who cares? It’s summer and school’s out, so I’m living by the Dodgeball motto: Aim low!First thing she does is go right under the desk and take a nap. No surprise there, and nothing I wouldn’t do.

The Five People You Meet in Heaven

2006-06-02T03:12:00.000-07:00

Mrs. Lamb, the second grade teacher who let you poop your tights in front of your classmates because she thought insufficient time had passed since lunch. She tells you life's a bitch and then you die.Mark, who stole your diary in high school and told all your secrets. He tells you, it's not gossip if it's common knowledge.Julie, who talked on her cell phone from New York City to Pittsburgh,

NEW FOR SUMMER, GET YOUR BQ ON

2006-06-01T03:27:00.000-07:00

Hey there beautiful people, test your bedroom quotient.What is your foot fetish in the bedroom? SucklingCataloguingRemoving callousesToys your boudoir would likely include?Hard-core S&M gear Having something I call boudoir would be playful enough Toys? The bedroom accessory that appeals most to you:Hidden camera Camera on a tri-pod Blackout shadesWhen you’re alone, you're most likely to wear to

Are you there God? It's me, Margaret.

2006-05-31T11:42:00.000-07:00

Years of Sleeping: Oh, I got a message. Hear that? Who could it be?? I can't wait to pull out my phone in front of everyone here, smirk into my dial pad and text back.SMS: This is your automatic verification of deposit.YOS: Oh God, what to do? I have to make it look, well, I could just look bored with the message. But no, too late... Thanks. Is it enough money to take a quick trip to Jordan?SMS:

My Interview with the Arctic Monkeys

2006-05-30T22:02:00.000-07:00

The Arctic Monkeys released Whatever People Say I Am, That's What I'm Not sometime in 2006, which puts me wildly ahead of the trend here. I think they're still trying to figure out how to censor, er, edit, Chinatown.Years of Sleeping: What's the deal with Andy? Rehab?Alex Turner: God, you're like, the last person to jump on board with this and right out of the gate with the tough questions.YOS:

Lather. Rinse. Repeat.

2006-05-30T11:27:00.000-07:00

"You’re reading The Rules? Isn't three years into your relationship a little late to step back and say, 'Whoa, I don't believe in sex before marriage?'" "Well I am a unique creature, and he better get used to that. It's clear now that if I'd let him pursue me, instead of taking that away from him, we'd probably already be married." "But last week, according to Love Languages, you told me

Satisfaction

2006-05-29T14:29:00.000-07:00

So sometimes, what with my five days experience blogging, I hit next blog, next blog, next blog up in the right-hand corner. And so I happened upon some housewife, writing about the various committees she's on or resigning from, cooking classes, raising her daughters and submitting to her Master. Or Overlord, or something. Then I think back to a story shared in all confidence, about a woman

After one hour

2006-05-28T03:54:00.000-07:00

My first encounter with fast food in this dusty country was neither quick nor particularly nourishing. Maybe I expected more because it wasn't McDonald's, though they do abound here. It was Hot Chicken. They were out of chicken. We ordered meat sandwiches. This ritual took about ten minutes, at which time they told us our mystery food would be ready, "after 20 minutes." My fellow diner

Jon Stewart, would you love me back?

2006-05-27T04:38:00.000-07:00

It's getting worse. Tonight I went to see M:I III. Does it even rank a full name? The biggest gap in logic has to be when the wife goes to the office party with all the Top Secret agents. Wait for it...She fails to pick up Jonathan Rhys Meyers and ditch Tom Cruise. Please. And does anyone else find it disturbing how the producers keep finding women who look like El Cruise's current love "interest

Decoding Bettie Page

2006-05-26T08:03:00.000-07:00

In two weeks' time back in the good old US, I managed to take in two films: "The Notorious Bettie Page," because it had been absolutely raved about, and "The DaVinci Code," because it was playing every three minutes. I left the "Page" film wondering, what the hell? Then "DaVinci" clinched it--it's all about the balls. Maybe you thought, tits!, it's the tits! So many film reviwers though are male

Is optimism doomed?

2006-05-25T12:36:00.000-07:00

At about 9.30 my friends had to wake me up to tell me to leave. Valerie offered her couch. I wanted to brush my teeth."I used to have spare toothbrushes," Valerie said. But she's not that optimistic anymore. I remember the day when I carried even dental floss.Then there was Jonathan, my first fiance. In an early phone episode he kept taking these long pauses. I had to ask. He was flossing.